Steve Rogers and The Battle Against Starvation
by Marie Nomad
Summary: Inspired by a AvengersKink prompt. Steve Rogers discovers Costco and Tony feels like he's in a superhero edition of Hoarders.


This is inspired by a prompt at AvengersKink Live Journal Community. The prompter wanted to see what would happen if Steve went to Costco. Many thanks to Arcane Legacy for betareading.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters. They belong to Marvel Comics. I don't own Costco either but they do have great bargains.

Steve Rogers and the Battle Against Starvation

By Marie Nomad

Tony struggled towards the kitchen with precious coffee in it. He could not finish adjusting the brainwave transmitter for the armor without the life giving essence of coffee.

He wandered to the living room to run into a massive box of macaroni and cheese. Curiously, he walked over to the kitchen to see another box marked 'ramen' next to the kitchen door. Finally, he stepped into the kitchen and that was when he saw it; boxes and boxes of food. There were huge boxes of frosted flakes, giant tubs of mayonnaise, and even restaurant size cans of corn all over the place. Suddenly, he felt like he was in an episode of Horders, superhero edition.

"JARVIS! Did Dummy went on eBay again?" Tony hollered as he started to move the boxes to the side hoping to reach the cabinet with the precious coffee inside.

"No, sir."

"Who did this and did they use my credit card?"

"Tony! Where are the storage areas?" Steve asked as he walked to the kitchen's door carrying a massive crate with the words 'baked beans' on it.

"You!" Tony pointed up at him. "Did you clutter up my kitchen?"

"Yes, I wanted to stock up and I found this place called, Costco. Look at this!" Steve opened the crate and picked up a huge can of baked beans. "This can alone has enough beans to feed the entire team!"

"But I hate beans." Tony glared at him. Of course, Steve happened to discover the 21st century concept of bulk foods. He haven't seen Steve this giddy since they went to an all you can eat buffet.

"Oh, well, the others will eat this. There's even a special section of emergency rations that I stocked up on. If we get snowed in, we won't have to go out to get food for several weeks."

Tony rolled his eyes at that statement. "Oh, that's just dandy. Except for three things; one, we are in one of the hottest summers in the last fifty years, two, streets can be plowed in just a day for easy access and three, Thor and I can fly."

Steve blinked and sighed. He looked around and smiled sheepishly at all the food. "I'm sorry, Tony. I should have talked to you first but when I saw all this food, I thought that we had to prepare. I don't want anyone to starve."

"Starve?" Tony nearly giggled. "I'm a billionaire. We already have a ton of food here and we can get delivery from anywhere in the city."

"But the economy might collapse, you lose your fortune, become homeless, and end up selling your body for a loaf of bread." Steve hugged Tony and vowed, "I won't let you sell your body for a loaf of bread!"

"Hey! My body is worth more than a loaf of bread! Wait a second... you lived through the depression didn't you?"

"When I was a boy."

Tony pushed him away and sat him down on the crate. He patted him on the head. "Steve, buddy, this is the 21st Century. One of our main problems is obesity not starving. I promise you, we won't starve. Besides, if the economy collapses, we could just join up with Thor and hunt for meat."

Steve chuckled as he shook his head. "I'm sorry. I'm always afraid that my friends won't get enough to eat. I saw all those bulk food items and I have that credit card you gave me..."

"It's fine. You didn't want anyone to stave, I get it. Just remember, I won't let you or anyone else go hungry. I'm rich."

"I will." Steve and Tony looked around at the overcrowded kitchen. "What are we going to do with all this food?"

XXX

Mrs. Hobson smiled as she helped Steve load all the food into the kitchen of the homeless shelter. "Thank you so much for donating all this food, Mr. America."

"Just call me Steve and it's no problem at all." Steve insisted.

"But, this can keep our kitchens stocked for the next month. The beans alone can last for at least a week."

Steve just smiled slightly and shrugged. "I just bought too much food and I didn't want it to go to waste."

The End


End file.
